This update may be a little bit behind but, I can explain why. I was looking for some real inspiration with music and in a recent chat session some members of a forum mentioned how much they like the Black Eyed Peas song I used in United Light so, I went back to that post and re-read that chapter with the song. And then I did the next chapter with it's playlist, and the next one and the next one all until about chapter 15 or so and I had been reading for nearly 2 hours and I had a few questions for this Shawna Harrison person myself ! It was definatley intersting because I learned my weaknesses as a writer and where it could have been better. I also saw that I was posting 9,000 word chapters regularly, I have no idea how I was doing that.
I also saw there actually exists a pretty clean transition from the light blue font to the purple font. I could also see where I was going to have Juliana pregnant but, changed it.
I admit I became a UL fan and while I will not let this affect Shawna Harrison the writer I
am kind of on the side of :
I didn't try and make it to obvious but, I can tell Rosa really cares about Elisa especially in the chapter when Sawyer comes back.
I also learned I use some common motif a lot of the time and I use a lot of the same things including :
*Dead parents
*Engaged couples
*Comic relief character
*Unrequited Love
*Quiet Characters
and a few others I can't think of but I saw a lot of elements I use constantly.
I also learned Shawna Harrison will never (maybe not never) write a sex scene ever again. While I may not be Tom Wolfe, the scenes did not give the vulnerability or passion I wanted it came off as clumsy. If I do write one though, I promise I will never use the word loins or quivering.
I'm also adding tags to my posts now it will make things a lot easier if I ever want to look back
IVB
On to IVB's I will start posting in groups of 4 but some of them are very short. Writing these short chapters kind of gets me thinking of writing short stories because with a few things added these chapters could function as their own story. I mentioned flash fiction earlier and looked into it and I'm not sure it's for me. You have to be very creative. There is supposedly a flash fiction by Hemingway that is 6 words and goes : For sale: baby shoes, never worn. I thought it was not much of a story and then I realized I was getting a real story from those words when I thought about it. It was very strange. I'm not sure if anyone gets that.
IVB Music
Some of this music will definatley follow a theme genre wise. This was the kind of music I always kind of imagined for this web serial. I had to use 2 songs for a chapter so they no longer go by chapter number. In a side note I was also going to use Thick as Theives by Dashboard at some point but Linda, stole it from me, lol ! It's okay though.
Here is chapter 14 to get you started
Chapter 14-- "Dance Inside" All-American Rejects
Chapter 15 "Numb" All American Rejects & "Comatose" Skillet
Chapter 16 "Can't Take it" All American Rejects
Chapter 17 "I see you" Leona Lewis (Try and take it out of it's context)
I was at the chat session I'm glad we helped ! Do you think LL would ever do one similar to that ?
ReplyDeleteHm, I used Stolen by Dashboard Confessional. So you're good.
ReplyDeleteIt's great how you can look at your work objectivly.
@ Violeta - I probably would.
Legendary Where Is My Other Fucking Sock game
ReplyDeleteDarcy brings the LULZ *runs to make icon*
I love how Slate can be super-angsty and hilarious at the same time.
ReplyDeleteNick's chapter was short sweet and I found it amazing, especially the part where he realizes he is alone.
ReplyDeleteReally ? I found myself more of a Rhett/Juliana fan once he was introduced.
ReplyDeleteOh, is that the Avatar song ? It's perfect for Elias's nerdy side.
ReplyDeleteI see Elias got a last name, After this I am totally calling Elias/Slate it's just to cute now.
ReplyDeleteIDK, I'm still convinced Emily is to good for Slate but he seems to really care about her.
ReplyDeleteOr "member" never use that one either, Shawna !
ReplyDeleteer, Emily made him coffee to-go ? Way to send a message. I wonder how Slate is going to get Emily to love him ...
ReplyDeleteI like how the humor helps with some of the sad parts of the story. As for Slate http://lmgtfy.com/?q=Huntington%E2%80%99s+Disease
ReplyDelete^ LOL !
ReplyDeleteSigg water bottle ? I see how it is. Does he have a custom one ?
I never expected this story to be so funny. It's sad how they are all broken up, somehow I see Darcy as like the "Jennifer Aniston" of the group.
ReplyDeleteOh, does this mean we will be seeing a UL short story soon (even if it is just 6 words ?)
ReplyDeleteLove how you made the Avatar song blue ! I actually liked the Juliana/Sawyer almost sex scene and the Sawyer/Elisa one, TBH
ReplyDelete^ I can see that I think the ones with Brad and Cortland were hard (Yeah, I know) becuase I didn't like them. I loved the one with Rhett and Juliana, Oh wait . . .
ReplyDeleteJK
I was hoping for Elias' chapter to be a little longer, once again I'm overly concerned about Darcy. It was nice hearing a little more about Slate's backstory.
ReplyDeleteWhat kind of questions did you have for "this" Shawna Harrison. I bet it was the same one's we had.
ReplyDeleteI just realized how much Slate and Elias have in common and it looks like they are going to be neighbors soon.
Even though Slate gave Emily HIV don't they realize that it mutates differently and they should still take precautions (or was that in the fade to black ?)
ReplyDeleteHi, Shawna my girlfriend has been trying to get me to read this for a while and while I do not have a comment I do have a question :
ReplyDeleteTina Roderick will you marry me ?
(:
Poor, Elias he can't seem to catch a break. I could feel his father's pain.
ReplyDelete. . . YES ! *Kisses*
ReplyDelete^ is Jealous ! Congratulations
ReplyDeleteIt is nice having you blog about UL again. Would you consider retagging each post ? That's a big endeavor. Love this chapter wish there was more to Eli's
ReplyDelete
ReplyDelete@Violeta-- I would join in for that too !
@Linda-- Oh, I have no idea why I thought you had that one. I was surprised at how objective I could be myself.
@Darcy_Lover-- He still has to be himself
@Maylights -- I'm glad to keep the humor (although I guess it's more comic relief)
@Natalie-- I know.
@Tabby-- I didn't read to that part so, maybe I need to and see if I change my mind but, I really like Juliana/Sawyer !
@Cory Ann- It is and I suppose it is perfect for that.
@Sundance Girl -- I wasn't going to give him one but, than I realized I had to or else it wouldn't make sense.
@Vanillabear-- I suppose
@CranberriVodka-- Noted, no one should ever us that in any context.
@Maylights-- Well, it was all she had that's why she has a paper cup too. But, in retrospect it is kind of a good idea so that if people want to leave they can take the coffee with them and no one feels obligated to do dished.
@Sawlisa-- It has more to do with the fact he isn't listening but, that is a good one !
@Harley-- Um, kind of . . .
@Nilla Latte-- I know I see that too but, I think it's because you meet him first.
@Biteme-- Yes, but I promise it won't be six words unless I get a really good idea.
@Ashlyn-- I actually like the Sawyer/Elisa one if I had to choose because I wanted to be more about love and passion. The I See You song is blue because that is the color for Huntingtons Awareness.
@Petite_B -- Lol, very funny
@HappyApple -- I know I am surprised at how long/short some of them are but a lot of Elias's story is told in other people's chapters.
@StrawberryM-- I had a lot of the same ones you all had in the comments. If I remember them I will tell you all.
@Wildehorses-- Well, there is a part where Slate tried to ask her if she is sure and she puts a condom in his mouth to shut him up but, that scene didn't work out so, yes they do use protection.
@Tina-- Say no and run while you still can, Tina !--Joel
Awwwww -Shawna
Thanks for the comments, I hope I answered them well.
ReplyDeleteLorri- I know but, Elias's dad wasn't trying to be mean to him, I was trying to get that across.
Carleigh-- It is but, it wouldn't be to much work, actually. I'll think about it.
Congratualtions Tina
It's not even Valentines Day, Shane. -- Joel